“Are you angry when someone’s armpits stink or when their breath is bad? What would be the point? Having such a mouth and such armpits, there’s going to be a smell emanating. You say, they must have sense, can’t they tell how they are offending others? Well, you have sense too, congratulations! So, use your natural reason to awaken theirs, show them, call it out. If the person will listen, you will have cured them without useless anger. No drama nor unseemly show required.”
MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 5.28
Another gem of an hilarious quote from Marcus Aurelius today — similar to the quote about being as honest as a smelly goat. Humor with wisdom, a winning combination!
Hilarity aside, if someone’s driving you nuts, rather than exploding in “useless anger”, think about helping them out by helping them understand. If they have smelly armpits, just getting angry isn’t going to solve anything. Be honest and tell them!
It’s likely that they’re just unaware that they’re bothering anyone, so where would any anger be directed anyway? Instead, upgrade their awareness in the moment, with grace and kindness. Allow them to retain their dignity while also coming to a new understanding of how their actions are affecting others.
And then you’ve actually been helpful.
Ryan Holiday, the author of The Daily Stoic book, points out in today’s chapter that it’s utterly futile (and actually harmful) to stew in your own anger. It’s better to either calmly address it, or set that emotion aside completely. If you can’t control the situation, then let it go.
And don’t let someone’s stinky armpits drive you to madness.
