Don’t Cast Blame

“If someone is slipping up, kindly correct them and point out what they missed. But if you can’t, blame yourself — or no one.”


When someone in your life is making mistakes, or driving you nuts, or doing poorly in some area — help them out. Gracefully and kindly steer them to the path that will bear fruit. It could even be an opportunity to show what you’ve learned in reading and following this website, and maybe they will pick up some of your good habits!

Whatever you do, don’t cast blame on them. That really doesn’t help anything at all. Look in the mirror and see if there’s something you can do differently, some way that you can modify your behavior to assist them. Perhaps they just need someone to listen to them more carefully. Maybe you have mis-perceived their intentions. Or possibly they just need some help in changing their perspective.

There’s also the possibility that this person simply hasn’t had the opportunities that you’ve had to focus on their self-improvement. They might be disadvantaged, in a sense — and we should treat them with as much grace and patience as we can muster. Dig deep for that compassion.

Finally, there is the option of just letting it go, as the author of The Daily Stoic mentions in today’s chapter. That’s always a good option!

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